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December 16, 2009

Back home

Filed under: Personal, Pregnancy — Tags: , , , , , , — llcall @ 6:25 pm

I’ve been home from the hospital for about three days now.  In some ways it has been almost as unexpected as the whole ER/hospital extravaganza.  We thought that coming home would be easier, I would be feeling better.  And I can see some improvements: my belly button incision is getting less tender (the surgeon was concerned with this one getting infected because it was particularly red and swollen initially); my shoulder pain is almost completely gone; and my abdominal pain is lessening.

But in other ways, it has been more difficult.  Those first few days were all about triage; we couldn’t think too far ahead and really, we didn’t even have many decisions to make.  But now that I’m home, I have nothing to do but what I do best . . . processing the past and contemplating the future.  You mix all that worrisome thinking with trying to cope with the pain without resorting to painkillers (these depressed the baby’s heart rate and variability while we were at the hospital, so I’m trying to avoid them), and you’ve basically got a recipe for a couple of teary meltdowns every day.

Neal’s personalized therapy is for us to talk about all the blessings we’ve seen over the last few days as well as some of the funny moments.  So here’s a few that I want to remember:


  • Making it to 32 weeks, as of this Thursday . . . this is a big, important milestone for fetal development, and the point at which the infant survival rate is almost 99%.
  • My midwife Jana’s persistence that I should be sent back down to the ER, rather than discharged.  Based on what the surgeon told us, there is a good chance my appendix would have ruptured if not for her intervention.
  • A visit from my Aunt Jo Ann, who shared some of her experiences with intense medical situations, including a premature daughter.  It was so timely because I had been having one of those aforementioned meltdowns, just feeling ill-equipped to make it through all this.  She reminded me that in the moments that I most need it, Heavenly Father will reassure me that I can do what needs to be done and care for our daughter no matter what happens.
  • Not being so itchy . . . Neal keeps reminding me, can you imagine if you were as itchy as you were two months ago with three incisions on your belly?
  • Flowers!  They really brighten up my room.  Thanks Audrey, Kaila, and Mom & Dad!


  • When I was first feeling the pain and unable to sleep, Neal was pretty convinced it was just gas pain from too much pizza.  And he always has ideas to help me feel better.  So picture Neal drilling me in calisthenics at 10pm, in order to alleviate the pain from what turned out to require emergency surgery about 12 hours later.  (This just cracks me up every time I think about it!)  I looked like this, minus the spandex and short-shorts, and with breaks for clutching my side when the pain got too intense:

  • When they released me from labor and delivery and sent me to the ER, there was no tech available at the moment to escort us, so they asked Neal if he could just wheel me down.  It sounded easy enough, until we realized that without a special key card you actually have to go outside to get to the ER.  So, it was about 7:30am, 10 degrees, and Neal is pushing me through a parking lot while I’m wearing an open-back hospital gown!
  • You know in movies where they are trying to visually show what people see when they are coming to, or coming out of anesthesia.  It’s like a warped, kaleidoscopy-type image.  Well, it was actually just like that!  Seriously, whoever first thought of that special effect knew what they were talking about.
  • My feet being so swollen that every time I walked it felt like huge flaps of skin were swaying from side-to-side on top of my feet.  Such a weird sensation!


  1. Get better soon.

    Comment by Audrey — December 16, 2009 @ 11:30 pm

  2. They asked Neal to push you? Tell them you want that trip deducted from your bill.

    Comment by Kirsten — December 17, 2009 @ 3:12 am

  3. Hang in there! Good job recognizing the positive! You made me chuckle!

    Comment by Vickie Blanchard — December 20, 2009 @ 2:39 am

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